Today has been very difficult. This morning we took Charlie into the Atlantic Veterinary  College to see Dr.Nielson. Over the past couple of days it had become clear to us  that Charlie wasn't getting better and so we were faced with a very difficult decision. It turned out to not be such a difficult decision since we love Charlie too much to let him just suffer, but it was very painful for us to come to that conclusion. As Josh and I said our 'goodbyes' to Charlie, he licked the tears off my hand. I really believe that Charlie knew how much we loved him. I cried the whole time knowing that I was going to miss him so much. I'm so grateful to Dr.Nielson for the wonderful care she gave to Charlie right  to the end.
Josh and I drove to his Mom's house in Miltown Cross to bury Charlie under a tree next to Josh's beloved childhood dog Bandit. Josh made a little cross out of popsicle sticks which we placed in the ground, and then Josh said a eulogy for Charlie that I thought couldn't have been more perfect.
It feels so different now that Charlie isn't here. I know we made the right decision and I'm so relieved when I think about how Charlie is no longer in pain. I strongly believe that animals do go to Heaven and that I'll see Charlie again one day. But for the present time, I just miss him so much. Having Charlie totally changed my view on small animals. Charlie had such a sweet and gentle nature. Even though he didn't like getting his medicine he never bit us or the vet. He spent much of his time cuddled up to either Josh or I, and he just totally won our hearts. My heart is filled with wonderful memories of staying up through the night with Charlie, and cuddling with him. These memories and many more, I will treasure.
After having known Charlie I find it all the more appalling that mice like him are tested on in labs. Having Charlie has  stirred  up my passion for animals (especially the small ones) and has strengthened my determination and commitment to only buy products and support charities that are cruelty-free.
I wish that we could have had Charlie for longer but I'm so grateful for the time that we did have with him. Even in that short time, God used him to do a great work in our hearts. I trust that even as I'm typing this Charlie is happy  and free, and enjoying Jesus, and finally living the life he deserves.

For cruelty-free products, check out the PETA shopping guide by clicking --here--

If you already don't think I'm kinda peculiar you may after reading this blog. Last night I took the 2-6am shift in watching Charlie. Since Josh would be getting his wisdom teeth removed the next day, he wasn't allowed to have liquids after midnight, meaning no coffee to help  him stay awake while watching Charlie, so we switched things up so that he could get more sleep.
I thought I'd be more tired than I was. I usually have a hard time staying up late, but I find that if I get watching something that interests me it's as if I forget that I'm tired. And I guess that's what happened last night. I had every reason to fall asleep. It was nice and warm in our apartment and Charlie was clinging to me and snuggling into my arm and it was just a cozy atmosphere over all.
I made some green peppermint tea and set out to find a movie on our hard drive to watch. When none of them interested me at all, I turned to Youtube and began looking up Christmas specials. And that began hours of indulging in Christmas shows and a bunch of 'For Better or for Worse' episodes (I've always liked the comic strip and didn't realize there were shows). 'Elmo Saves Christmas' took me into the wee hours of the morning and before I knew it, Josh was getting up to get ready for his appointment.
Now if I was just sitting by myself watching videos on Youtube, it wouldn't have been that memorable or satisfying. But it was this little mouse curled up in the crook of my arm which touched my heart and made me feel all warm inside. It certainly is a blessing to share our lives with animals. After caring for Charlie, I'll never look at a mouse the same. He is so gentle and affectionate. He hasn't had it the easiest in life, yet he has so much love to give. I feel like I'm learning so much from these night shifts with Charlie. I feel that God is shaping in me a tender and compassionate heart, and he's using a little mouse to do it.

This past week was my last week of classes before Christmas break. It feels great to be back in Early Childhood Care and Education. We started a new course called ‘Inclusion’ which is all about how to include and support all people (different cultures, different types of families, special needs, etc) in the Early Childhood setting. It is a great course so far and I feel like it really hits home as I reflect on the variety of people I’ve met in my life and the wonderful children I’ve spent time with at Double H Ranch.

Josh and I have been continuing to provide constant care for our fancy mouse Charlie in hopes that we can help restore him back to health. Just last Sunday we began giving him another round of meds, a diet of brown rice with vitamin drops, and several rub-downs with organic extra virgin olive oil. With no intervention though, Charlie would keep scratching his wounds making any hope of healing look slim. It didn’t take Josh and I long to realize that if Charlie had any chance of recovering we would need to treat him just as a sick baby, and tend to him constantly. So we began taking shifts. One of us would sit on the couch with Charlie for a few hours while the other would sleep. I’m usually no good at staying up late but clementines, tea, and chick flicks all worked in my favour when I’d begin nodding off. The night would be spent stopping Charlie from scratching and reapplying oil every couple hours or so. Josh and I would each get about 4 hours of sleep a night. I was sure to pack tea and fruit to eat during class and I gave one of my classmates permission to hit me if I fell asleep but thankfully it never came to that. In our classes we barely spend a day just sitting a listening so between obsessive tea drinking and group activities I managed to stay awake

Now it is Christmas break and Josh and I can let each other sleep longer in the morning and hopefully we’ll start catching up on our sleep somewhat. Josh is getting all of his wisdom teeth removed this Thursday. On that same day we’ll probably be taking Charlie back to the AVC, and see what Dr.Nielson thinks of the progress he’s made and if she sees any value in us continuing to do what we’re doing with him. Charlie’s wounds are healing but they’re healing slowly and since he still gets some scratches in, that hinders the healing process all the more. I hope so badly that Charlie will get all healed up and that we won’t have to put him down. Josh and I have bonded with the little guy so much during the time. I’ve read that mice are social but I never knew what that meant until I experienced Charlie crawling in the crook of my arm and cuddling with me. He is such a nice pet and deserves to be living better than he is. So we’ll be praying for wisdom in these upcoming days to decide what to do next, and will continue provide constant care for him.

I finished my biology course with 2 weeks to spare; long enough to have a nice little break and get some other things done, and not too long that I would start getting squirrely. Looking back at these past couple of weeks I  feel very glad for how I've spent them. Visiting friends, volunteering at the Humane Society, participating in outreach with Christ on Campus, Christmas shopping, reading, and then there was the one morning where I indulged in a big bowl of popcorn and watched 'My Sister's Keeper'.  
I feel that through my daily activities God has been  asking me to include Him and to be with Him and enjoy Him. I love to be on the go, but God is teaching me to be still and to savour His goodness and presence. God is also teaching me to spend all my busy times with Him. And in this way there isn't a separation of 'my quiet times with God', and 'the rest of my life'. God wants to be in it all. He longs for me and wants me to know Him better and better.

Something else God is teaching me is a lesson of compassion through our little pet mouse Charlie, who hasn't been in the best health lately. Ever since we took him home from the Humane Society we noticed that he scratched a lot. When we took him to the vet it was discovered that he had mites in his fur, so we got some medicine that cleared away the mites. Charlie still continued to scratch obsessively to the point of ripping one of his ears. I think one of the best decisions we made for Charlie was to take him to the Atlantic Veterinary College. The girls at the AVC have been extremely helpful and so kind to us. They discovered his ears had become infected , and so we received some oral medicine and ear drops. They also made suggestions to cut out some possible allergens, since domestic mice are prone to be allergic to many things such as wood shavings, corn, wheat, and sunflower seeds.

It seemed that Charlie's condition was improving and he was scratching less, but just recently he spiraled back into his excessive scratching, inflicting wounds on his ears and shoulders. Josh and I carefully considered whether we should have him euthanized. As much as we love Charlie and would hate to have to put him down, we don't want him to live a life where he's suffering and tearing himself apart. 
But we decided we weren't quite ready to throw in the towel. It was hard to think of putting him down when I'd see him run on his wheel, dig a nest or do other little mousey activities where it seemed he could have been enjoying himself.  I discovered that Charlie was still consuming corn and wheat through the rodent blocks we were giving him, and so I've switched him to an diet of boiled brown rice for the time being to see if that makes a difference. We're also rubbing him down with organic cold-pressed olive oil which seems to be helping him in the way that he's less itchy. As his wounds become tender from the oil the challenge is to keep him from scratching and reopening those wounds. Josh and I are currently taking shifts where we take Charlie out of his cage and try to prevent him from scratching , by keeping him busy and distracted. The little guy likes riding on our shoulder and snuggling in the pocket of Josh's hoodie.

I know mice aren't on the top of everyone's lists and some may think it's strange or over sentimental of us for taking such measures to try and restore a little mouse back to good  health. Not only do I feel a responsibility to care for Charlie because we adopted him, but also just the simple fact that he is a small, helpless creature who has feelings and the capability to both enjoy life and suffer,  and has been bestowed with the gift of life. To not even try to help him because 'he's just a mouse' to me, doesn't reflect the compassionate, humble and loving character that I believe to be of Christ.

And to not care for Charlie would be to miss out on a lesson of compassion, charity and kindness that I believe God is teaching me through this experience. It's a humbling experience to care for 'the least of these' even when others make it known to you that they don't see the value in it. But then, some people do and have offered a lot of advice and prayer and that's encouraging as well.
But when it comes down to it, each of us are responsible to act in the way that we feel God is leading us, and I think sometimes that can take the form of caring for the tiniest , most  seemingly insignificant creatures.